Hump Day Humor

A video, this time. Be sure to watch, past the skateboarders.

Sence of Humor

This is from yesterday's Letters to the Editor in the L.A. Times:

Right-wing religious activists exhorted their followers to pray for rain for Obama's speech in Denver, where the weather was perfect.

Now a hurricane may be heading toward New Orleans right in the middle of the GOP convention coverage, reminding voters of the total incompetence of the White House during the Katrina disaster.

This timing should give pause to atheists everywhere: God apparently has a sense of humor.

Hans Laetz

Malibu



Yup, God does have a sense of humor, and the photos are mine.

Laundry

Colleen at MommyAlwaysWins, (don't you just love the name of her blog?), commented about how her hubs is the worse when it comes to doing laundry.

Doing laundry isn’t my fave thing either. This is how I solved this, in case you're interested. As soon as my girls, were old enough to reach the controls on the washer and dryer, I taught them to do their own laundry. Then, I thought, “Wow, this is great, but I’m still doing tons of laundry!”

I kicked my brain in gear and figured out why. Bob had 4-5 times as much laundry as I did and he was very happy to have me do it for him. Well, I rebelled and informed him that if he wanted clean clothes, he could do his own laundry. I even bought him his own hamper. The poor guy wasn’t all that happy, but oh, well.

The reason he had so much more laundry that me, and still does, are two fold. My laundry consist of mainly under clothes, panties, bras and socks. I’m not very messy, and don’t perspire or have oily skin, so my outer clothes can be worn more than once. Now, Bob not only is messy, he perspires, has oily skin, and he’s an athlete. He’ll will change his clothes from the skin out, one, two, or three times a day, and each time, everything, except maybe Levi’s have to be washed, before being worn again. Before we retired, his work clothes were always sent to the dry cleaners; first, because he was in uniform, then when he made detective, he wore a suit every day with a shirt and tie; so we’re just talking leisure clothing and underwear, here.

To this day, Bob still does his own laundry. It’s been over 35 years, since I started this program, and he’s gotten used to the idea, and he's never had to hang it on a clothes line. That may have been the deal-breaker.

Hump Day Humor

From my friend Angela:

A man came home from work and found his three children outside, still in their pajamas, playing in the mud, with empty food boxes and wrappers strewn all around the front yard.

The door of his wife's car was open, as was the front door to the house and there was no sign of the dog. Proceeding into the entry, he found an even bigger mess. A lamp had been knocked over, and the throw rug was wadded against one wall. In the front room the TV was loudly blaring a cartoon channel, and the family room was strewn with toys and various items of clothing.

In the kitchen, dishes filled the sink, breakfast food was spilled on the counter, the fridge door was open wide, dog food was spilled on the floor, a broken glass lay under the table, and a small pile of sand was spread by the back door. He quickly headed up the stairs, stepping over toys and more piles of clothes, looking for his wife.

He was worried she might be ill, or that something serious had happened. He was met with a small trickle of water as it made its way out the bathroom door. As he peered inside he found wet towels, scummy soap and more toys strewn over the floor. Miles of toilet paper lay in a heap and toothpaste had been smeared over the mirror and walls.

As he rushed to the bedroom, he found his wife still curled up in the bed in her pajamas, reading a novel. She looked up at him, smiled, and asked how his day went.

He looked at her bewildered and asked, "What happened here today?"

She again smiled and answered, "You know every day when you come home from work and you ask me what in the world did I do today?"

"Yes," was his incredulous reply.

She answered,

"Well, today I didn't do it."

photo by EmilyAnn

National Dog Day

Today is National Dog Day.

Here are our two Cairn Terriers.

First is Lizzie. She had her 11th birthday this month. She's a rescue dog, and has lived with us for almost 5 years. Her previous owner was a dog breeder and Lizzie had never been treated as a pet. She doesn't play with any dog toys, and wasn't accustomed to going for walks. Yes, she was trained as a show dog, but not walking around the neighborhood. The first week we had her, I noticed bloody paw prints on the sidewalk, her little paws were bleeding from walking around the neighborhood. I carried her home, and once she was recovered, we built up slowly, so she wouldn't have that problem again. Lizzie's nickname is "Killer". She's killed rabbits, birds and lizards, in our yard. When she's out for a walk she ignores all the "game" she encounters. Afterall, it's not in HER yard.

My favorite story about Lizzie is the day we brought her home. She came into the house from the garage, kind of looked things over, as she walked. She went into our bedroom, looked at Dudley's bed, by-passed it, went to her bed and got in. She didn't leave her little doggie bed, except to eat and go for walks for the first week. We don't think she ever had her own bed before, just a crate.

Lizzie always does her best to not have her picture taken, so this is her best shot.

Here's Dudley, he's a great dog, all boy. Dudley will be 9 in November, and we got him just over 5 years ago. Before he lived with us he was in the Marines, (he lived with a Marine and his family). When Dudley misbehaves, we threaten him with a court marshall, and he seems to understand. Dudley loves to play. His favorite toy is a tennis ball. He always has a few, but loves just one. He always knows where it is, and will decline any others, if you try to trick him. When he's ready to play, he finds his tennis ball and starts throwing at you. If you're not interested in playing, he keeps throwing it at you, because he's sure he can change your mind.

Dudley is fast. Our groomer, who also breed welsh corgi's, says Dudley is the fastest dog she's seen. When we travel Dudley and Lizzie stay at her kennel, and she plays with them daily.

Dudly is a ham, loves to have his photo taken.

Tomorrow

National Dog Day is tomorrow, August 26. I copied this collage from their website. I was thinking, why doesn't everyone post a photo or two of their dogs, tomorrow? No linking back, just celebrate your canine companion(s). Also, post this on your site, if you want to give others, who might want to do this, a heads up.

Hump Day Humor

From an email:

Jennifer's wedding day was fast approaching. Nothing could dampen her excitement - not even her parent's nasty divorce. Her mother had found the PERFECT dress to wear and would be the best Dressed mother-of-the-bride ever!

A week later, Jennifer was horrified to learn that her father's new young wife had bought the exact same dress! Jennifer asked her to exchange it, but she refused. "Absolutely not, I look like a million bucks in this dress, and I'm wearing it," she replied.

Jennifer told her mother who graciously said, "Never mind sweetheart. I'll get another dress. After all, it's your special day." A few days later, they went shopping and did find another gorgeous dress.

When they stopped for lunch, Jennifer asked her mother, "Aren't you going to return the other dress? You really don't have another occasion where you could wear it.

Her mother just smiled and replied, "Of course I do, dear. I'm wearing it to the rehearsal dinner the night before the wedding."

I don't think this is the dress in question, but some one very talented made it. Photo by Alex Balloon Boy

Do you Etsy?

Whenever I want something unique I shop at Etsy. Carrie does, too, and I'm often the lucky recipient. Here are the bracelets she gave me for my birthday:

Aren't they wonderful. I get mega compliments each and every time I wear them. She got them at the Etsy shop, annie & olive. So, my point is, if you don't want to search for that perfect gift for some one, even yourself, give Etsy a try.

The Hair God

I've been getting my hair cut by the same guy, Tom the Hair God, for over 30 years. When we started our cutting-edge relationship, he was in his 20's and I was in my 30's. We grew up and old together. My hair stages have been plentiful, the super short Sasson cut, the long and curly gypsy cut. I wore it in a bob, no relation, for years, and now it's short again. He never 'does' my hair, just cuts it; spends 60 minutes cutting, and making it perfect. He has owned 3 salons in this time, all in Costa Mesa, all just west of the 405, and South Coast Plaza. His current salon, The Crew, is very young and euro-hip, located in The Lab.

The past 10 years, I've lived a long way from Costa Mesa, about 70 miles. The drive takes between 1 & 1 1/2 hours, depending in traffic; so when I get me hair cut, I'm away from home about 4 hours. That's half a work day, to put it in perspective.

Since I've lived here, I've tried various hair cutters. I've asked different people - Who cuts your hair. Sometimes these new relationships last one haircut, sometimes up to a year, but I always end up going back to Tom the Hair God. It's been my experience that eventually these local cutters get lazy, and I'm in and out in less than 30 minutes, or they want to make me look 78, 88 or 98, you know helmet hair.

Recently I asked a twenty-something, at work, Who cuts your hair. I gave this new hair cutter a try, today. Her name is Monica the Hair Goddess. If she keeps this up, no more trips to Costa Mesa. Sorry, Tom the Hair God.

Hump Day Humor

Photo, uncredited, was attached to an email.


An older, tired-looking dog wandered into my yard; I could tell
from his collar and well-fed belly that he had a home and was
well taken care of.

He calmly came over to me, I gave him a few pats on his head;
he then followed me into my house, slowly walked down the
hall, curled up in the corner and fell asleep.

An hour later, he went to the door, and I let him out.
The next day he was back, greeted me in my yard, walked inside
and resumed his spot in the hall and again slept for about an hour.
This continued off and on for several weeks.

Curious, I pinned a note to his collar: 'I would like to find out who
the owner of this wonderful sweet dog is and ask if you are aware
that almost every afternoon your dog comes to my house for a nap.'

The next day he arrived for his nap, with a different note pinned to
his collar: 'He lives in a home with 6 children, 2 under the age of 3 -
he's trying to catch up on his sleep. Can I come with him tomorrow?'

Life is a Cabaret, old chum...

Yesterday, went to Cabaret. It was a fantastic presentation by our local Community Theater. They did a great job. Sally Bowles was played by a local 17 year old high schooler, I see great things in her future. We've always supported the theater, both professional and community; but with community theater, we're never sure what will happen. That's part of the fun.

You knew this, didn't you.

I found this at Judy's. She scored 151, Very Superior, she may not talk to me any more.

22 As a 1930s wife, I am Very Poor (Failure) Take the test!

Scoring:

0-24 - Very Poor (Failure)
25-41 - Poor
42-58 - Average
59-75 - Superior
76+ - Very Superior

Take the quiz, and see how you do.

Lorenzo : the Flying French Man...

After going to the circus this week, my friend Kaye sent me this video. It's really great.


Lorenzo : the Flying French Man...
Uploaded by alatebo

We went to the Circus

We went to the Ringling Bros/Barnum and Bailey Circus this week. Our good friends, Kay and Gary, invited us, and I didn't hesitate. I love the circus. We had an excellent time, dinner first, at the excellent JT Schmid's Restaurant & Brewery, across the street from The Pond, the circus, then a stop at DQ on the way home. Doesn't get much better than that.

There's so much action, movement and general excitement at a circus performance, it was hard to get great shots. I took tons of photos, and about 10-15% are acceptable, but it wasn't about the photos, it was about the good time that we shared.

My photo at the art museum.

Well, I can dream, can't I?

I was fooling around trying to capture a "hot" image for the Picture This blog. When I heat my water for tea in the morning I use this electric tea kettle, and when I raised the lid, lots of steam poured out, but as you can see, I couldn't capture it (the steam). Oh, the challenges.

I imported the photo to Photobucket hoping for some good results. I think the results are great, but as you can see, it doesn't feel HOT.

Jess posted one of her Time Wasters, dumpr, and I gave it a try. I really thought it was fun, I guess I'm easy. Hey, you don't have to agree so easily. Here are a couple of other alternatives:





Art Museum by dumpr.net

So, what is Strange Fruit?

This is from their brochure:

“Strange Fruit is a Melbourne-based performing arts company that produces and
performs a remarkable style of work that fuses theatre, dance and circus, using a
unique elevated medium.”

“Perched atop 4 metre high flexible poles of original design, the troupe delivers a
sublime performance, bending and swaying in the air, captivating and engaging
the audience in absolute fascination.”

On Saturday morning, I drove to downtown LA to see a free performance of their show "Swoon". The performance was sponsored by Brookfield Properties, the managers of the 7+Fig shopping mall. These are some of the descriptive words I would use:

Amazing
Athletic
Awe Inspiring
Creative
Dramatic
Fun
High, Very High
Too Brief

Now, here are some more photos. You knew that, didn't you?















If they come to your area, be sure to see them. It was totally worth the 170 mile round trip.

Hump Day Humor

This is one of those dripping sweet email jokes we get all the time. I thought the photos in this one were very good. The real punch line is at the bottom. Such a GREAT use of the tax dollars of the residents of Oregon.

1.)Brush twice a day!

2.)Dress right for the weather.

3.)Visit the dentist regularly.

4.)Get plenty of rest.

5.)Make sure your hair is dry before going outside.

6.)Eat right.

7.)Get outside in the sun every once in a while.

8.)Always wear a seatbelt.

9.)Control your drinking of alcoholic beverages.

10.)Smile! It will make you feel better.

11.)Don't over indulge yourself.

12.)Bathe regularly.

13.) Read to exercise the brain.

14.)Surround yourself with friends.

15.)Stay away from too much caffeine.

16.)Use the bathroom regularly.

17.)Get plenty of exercise.

18.)Have your eyes checked regularly.

19.)Eat plenty of vegetables.

20.)Believe that people will like you for who you are.

21.)Forgive and forget.

22.)Take plenty of vacations.

23.)Celebrate all special occasions.

24.) Pick up a hobby.

25.)Love your neighbor as yourself.

Do all these things and you will be a happier, healthier person!

This e-mail is a public record of the City of Beaverton and is subject to public disclosure unless exempt from disclosure under Oregon Public Records Law.

Red State, Blue State Humor

Politics is always good for a laugh.

People are Really Good

This is another one to file under: People are Really Good. We went to a ball game, again last night. As I was waiting in line to get tickets, a lovely young woman in front of me, turned around and gave me 3 vouchers for free attendence. So, we got to go in the turnstiles for free. Amazing.

We had another great time at the game. Remember, this is single A minor league baseball, and anything can happen. Last night we were entertained by a gorilla and Rally Cop, in addition to Thunder, the huge green dog.

This beautiful girl conked out in the 8th inning, but up to then she was having a great time.

Yesterday.

The Fifth of July was a very busy one for us. First, I created a really great recipe to take to Aunt Vicky's for our annual family get-together. Attendance was down this year, there are usually 50-60 relatives from all over the U.S., this year it was closer to 40-45. But the good news is that a great time was had by all who attended. Plus, there was enough food for an army.

There was one mishap, created by moi, when Sharon called in the AM for directions to Aunt Vicky's, I used MapQuest to help her, I know better, I should have pulled out the Thomas Guide. I actually use MapQuest a lot, it can get you across the country, no problem, but the directions at the very end of your journey may not be accurate. So, that's what happened, yesterday, luckily she's not only beautiful and intelligent, she's tenacious, and found her way to the party, on her own.

After Aunt Vicky's we went home and fed the dogs, said sorry Lizzie and Dudley, we're leaving again. We went to a Storm baseball game. Oden's staying with us for a week, and that's one of his fave thing to do. It was a great game and we stayed to the end for the fireworks.

It was Storm jersey give away night, but they didn't anticipate such a large turn out and they ran out before we passed thru the turnstiles.

File this part under People are Really Good; after the game, as we were walking thru the parking lot to our car, a man asked if we'd gotten jerseys; when we said no, he gave Oden one. Oden was thrilled, he said,

This is the best, ever!

Anything can happen at a Class A minor leage baseball game, anything. Last night there were at least three gouls lurking about. Amazing.